time：2023-01-30 03:41:06 source：chloeaktas.com author：Working women

Between middle-aged couples, it seems that the "abstinence" lifestyle is tacitly accepted

Some time ago, our family sat in front of the TV and watched TV. In the TV series, many young people were in love, and our family was very fascinated. My parents have already reached retirement age, but when they see the passionate love in TV series, they still have tears in their eyes, they still feel very beautiful, and they like to watch such TV series very much. In fact, people of every age have a different yearning for love. They always feel that this is their lost youth, and they always feel that those days will never go back. The feeling of memory. The reason why people have such expectations for love is that after getting married, the shadow of love will become less and less, and the life we ​​expect is different from what we imagined before, which is why many people do not want to get married The reason, or the reason for regret after getting married. Especially in middle age, the communication between husband and wife became less and less, and even started an abstinence lifestyle: 01. After middle age, many couples have started abstinence in thinking. When we are just with a person, we have various requirements for this person, so we have a lot of desires, we really hope that the other party can do for us, and we also hope that the other party can meet our own requirements. Then sometimes we feel that the other party does not meet our requirements, so we will quarrel with the other party. Many people feel that the other party does not care, and they feel that the other party does not take their own words to heart, so they get angry at the other party. Therefore, when falling in love, sometimes two people feel very tired, and there are many conflicts between the two. But after getting married, as the years change, as we slowly get used to each other, we will find that in fact, everyone has different ideas. Sometimes you keep letting the other party change, or let the other party achieve Your own demands will only make the two people more and more conflicted, and will only put this marriage in jeopardy. If you find this problem in your marriage, then if you change your thinking in time, your marriage will last for a long time, but if you are always the same as when you were in love, it is easy for your marriage to end. . A couple who can last until middle age, then the couple must not have so many requirements in terms of thinking, nor do they have much expectations for each other, so the two people have less quarrels, then the marriage between the two can continue. Society is so cruel, and love is so cruel. Everyone has their own ideas. When you blindly ask others to change and have some desires in their thoughts, the other party will feel that they are bearing humiliation and burdens. Especially when two people have some requirements, the marriage can't go on anymore. In marriage, you have to know how to turn one eye and turn one eye away, so that such a marriage can last for a long time. Although sometimes there is not much love, but when you turn one eye and close one eye, two people It will be very comfortable, then it will be a good state for the other party and for yourself. That's why some people say: "Love is like a handful of sand. The harder you hold it, the faster the sand leaks." When you think about changing other people's thoughts and thinking about changing someone , In fact, others cannot be changed, but the love between the two of you will become less and less, and the two of you will become more and more tired, and may eventually separate. 02. After middle age after physical abstinence, the husband and wife also started a mode of physical abstinence. When two people first got together, they were both apprehensive and longing for this kind of thing. At that time, the two of them hadn't happened in this regard. The girl always thought that after this kind of incident happened to her, she would be with the other party for the rest of her life. , Boys feel that if they do this kind of thing to girls, then they have to be responsible for girls for a lifetime. At this time, the two of them felt that this kind of thing was particularly sacred, that girls were sacred and inviolable, and girls also felt that boys were particularly violent, so they didn't dare to think about this easily. In the end, the two people secretly tasted the forbidden fruit and felt the ups and downs, which would make the relationship between the two get better and better, and they were also addicted to this aspect when they were young. After the two people finish the end, as their physical condition declines, they will become less and less concerned about this aspect, so at this time, the two people may not do this kind of thing for a long time. In terms of physiology, although there are some needs, But it's not that strong anymore. After a lot of men and women reach middle age, they don't even have any communication in this regard, resulting in the relationship between the two becoming weaker and weaker. In the end, the relationship between women and men may be like boiled water. . But the most frightening thing is that after the end, one person still has this desire, but the other person does not have this desire. When it reaches this level, there will definitely be some contradictions in the marriage of two people, among which are One party will definitely be dissatisfied, while the other party feels a lot of pressure. So this tells two people: whether they choose the way of abstinence or choose to continue, the two must reach agreement. In this way, the relationship between husband and wife can be harmonious and the life of the two people can be happy. Couples after middle age should be more tolerant, less complaining, and agree on certain things. In this way, the two people will feel happy. When you reach middle age, stop trying to change the other person, and stop controlling the other person in terms of thinking, because this person has never changed in his life, and it is even more impossible to change at the end. When you reach middle age, you should also take care of the other person’s emotions physically. When you have some desires, you should tell the other person about your concerns and sadness in your heart. The other person will definitely understand you, because the two are together. Life is not easy. After you have a certain emotional foundation, you can say something directly. After reaching a certain age, we must solve the problems in marriage instead of blindly creating problems. At this time, we have some responsibilities on our shoulders, and we should also understand the heavy burden on each other’s shoulders. If the other person can't get through, don't get along with yourself.

(Responsible editor：Single woman)

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