You may never know that it is never someone else but yourself that is causing your unhappiness in life-chloeaktas.com

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You may never know that it is never someone else but yourself that is causing your unhappiness in life

time：2023-03-26 08:01:11 source：chloeaktas.com author：Graduate girl

You may never know that it is never someone else but yourself that is causing your unhappiness in life

Life is never easy. Although many people live optimistically, they have also experienced a lot of misfortune in their hearts, but they still choose to treat life with an optimistic attitude. Take Chu Shijian, for example, he used to be the "China Tobacco King" and his career was very successful, but then he was imprisoned and his daughter jumped off the building. When he regained his freedom, he did not succumb to this huge setback. He contracted 2,400 mu of barren hills, started to grow oranges, and re-entered the road of entrepreneurship. You must know that he was in his seventies at that time. However, he ran around the orchard every day, and finally made "Chu Orange" the most famous orange brand in China. If he had chosen to give up at the beginning and lived in such a self-sacrificing way, wouldn't it be a normal choice in the eyes of many people? Because after encountering a relatively big blow, it seems that people have reasons to choose to live unfortunately. However, whether you choose to start over or choose to live in misfortune, in the final analysis, it is a personal choice, outsiders can't control it, only you can decide. You may never know that it is never someone else but yourself that has caused your life to be unhappy. Regarding this, in the book "The Courage to Be Hated", it has been clearly stated. There is a passage in the book: "For example, now you can't feel happy. Sometimes you feel very miserable in life, and even want to become someone else. However, the reason why you are unfortunate now is because you have chosen "unfortunate" yourself. Instead of being born unfortunate.” Some people always feel that there is inherent misfortune in this world, some people are born well, but some people just live an ordinary life even if they work hard all their lives. However, luck and misfortune are all in oneself, not others. There are people from bad backgrounds, but there are still people who live well. For example, Naval Ravikant in "Naval Collection" was born in a poor immigrant family. After his parents separated, he lived with his mother. While working, his mother also raised him and his brother, so he grew up as a child. I learned to take care of myself. It was a difficulty for him, of course, but he said that everyone has difficulties and that difficulties help him grow in many ways. Because he lives in an unsafe environment, he basically stays in the library after class and doesn't go home until it closes. So what happened to him afterward? He became a well-known investor in Silicon Valley, a successful entrepreneur, he achieved financial freedom, and he felt very happy. There are a lot of rich people and a lot of happy people, but there are very few people who are rich and feel happy. So how does he do this? In the end, it is the result of his own choice. He chose to work hard to make his life better. After he chose to have money, he restrained his desires so that he could live in the moment and feel the peace and beauty of the moment. Had he not chosen to do so, his life would have been different. So, who forced him to choose this way? No, it was all the result of Naval's own active choice. Because of this, in the book "The Courage to Be Hated", when the "young man" wanted the "philosopher" to admit that there is inherent misfortune in this world, the "philosopher" said the above paragraph, and the philosopher told the young man, His misfortune was the result of his own choice. In this regard, "youth" is naturally unacceptable, just like many people can't accept it. In their view, they are powerless, helpless, helpless, and they are the victim, the unfortunate person, They yearn for their own happiness more than anyone else, how could they choose to make themselves unhappy? Perhaps you have also had this idea. You want to be happy more than anyone else, but when you face misfortune, you don’t know what to do. It seems that there is no other way but to accept it. You also occasionally complain about the injustice of fate. However, it's all really your own choice. You must know that everyone has the right to choose at any time, but you choose this way, and someone chooses another way. So why did the "philosopher" tell the "youth" that he chose misfortune? Just because when the "Youth" chooses to be unlucky, it's good for him so that he doesn't have to make any changes for it, it's something that can be done for him, but change is for him is difficult. This is like a very fat person who wants to lose weight, but he finds all kinds of reasons why he can't insist on losing weight. In the end, he envies other people's slimness and blames God for making him fat. It's the same reason, because he If you don't want to change your previous lifestyle for weight loss, you have to think that you are born fat, in order to relieve your inner discomfort. But if he really takes weight loss seriously, he can lose weight completely. Therefore, the "philosopher" will tell the "youth" that all misfortunes are the result of their own choices. And a person does not change, but also because he has made up his own "not changing" determination. After all, it is easier to maintain the status quo than to change. The book "The Courage to Be Hated" is about Adler's psychology, which contains a lot of psychological knowledge that subverts our cognition. The above point is only mentioned at the beginning of this book. It may be difficult for you to accept it at first, but in the end, you will be glad that you met this book in your lifetime, because this book will free you from your habitual thinking in the past, and let you learn to re-examine yourself and your life, Let you know what has been hindering your change, and you don't need to live in the approval of others at all, you are just yourself, you don't need to be anyone, just be yourself. Of course, if you want to be such a person, you need to have the "courage to be hated". We don't deliberately make others hate it, but we also have the courage to face the hatred of others. Only such a person can live freely Only then will you get rid of the unfortunate life and finally live your life well. --END-- Like to click and follow!

(Responsible editor：Single woman)

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