"What I look forward to most every day is the hourly work, and I can say a few words": The loneliness of the elderly living alone

time:2023-03-26 09:01:36 source:chloeaktas.com author:Single woman
"What I look forward to most every day is the hourly work, and I can say a few words": The loneliness of the elderly living alone

At dusk, when the sun is about to go down, it means that the time of the day is about to end. Compared with the noise of the day, tranquility is the main theme of the night. Similarly, loneliness may also be the main theme of the elderly in their later years. It is no longer the stars holding the moon, but one must get used to the long night alone. 87-year-old Uncle Zhao has lived alone for more than ten years. Ten years ago, after his wife left before him, he lives alone. Uncle Zhao has a son, and his son has a son, but these descendants are not in China, but in the United States, and they cannot return once a year. When there was no epidemic, I could come back once a year, but now I haven't come back for two or three years. Uncle Zhao’s thinking is relatively old-fashioned. He is not young enough to accept the new model. Video calls and WeChat are areas that he cannot reach. For mobile phones, he is limited to making calls. An old-fashioned one-hundred-dollar Nokia is enough for him, and the standby time is long enough. Although my son was abroad, he didn't ignore him completely. He had asked Uncle Zhao several times to go to the United States with him, but he was stubborn, and he didn't want to go back to the roots one day. Similarly, I don’t want to go to a nursing home. I have a natural rejection of Uncle Zhao in the nursing home. I think that if I go to a nursing home, I might as well throw him a rope directly. A few years ago, Uncle Zhao went downstairs and chatted with the neighbors. In recent years, his legs and feet have been uneasy, so he stayed in a small house of 60 square meters all day. The highlight of the day is when my son hires a part-time worker to deliver meals or clean up for him at mealtime. He comes twice a day, one and a half hours each time. During this precious time, Mr. Zhao hurriedly chatted with the eldest sister, the part-time worker, but the eldest sister disliked him to speak slowly behind his ears. You want to ask Uncle Zhao why he didn't let his son hire a live-in nanny? In fact, he is not poor in money, and his son is not poor in money, but he is stubborn, thinking that part-time workers will save money and hire part-time workers. Recently, the community has launched a volunteer service, which is to call on young people to take the initiative to chat with the elderly living alone, which makes Uncle Zhao happy. However, the volunteers stopped coming after a few visits. It is said that the volunteer girl was a high school graduate who came to be a volunteer during the summer vacation, and stopped coming after she went to a university abroad. Uncle Zhao fell into the monotonous cycle of waiting for the hourly lady every day. Fortunately, his health is not bad, this is the only consolation. In the information society, what should the social ideals of the elderly in their later years look like? In fact, like Uncle Zhao, the older the elderly, the stronger the need for social interaction. How to achieve the ideal state of the social circle of the elderly? The social objects of the elderly in the information society should be composed of "old friends", family members and intergenerational "little friends". An old friend is an old friend of an old man. Usually old classmates, old colleagues, old neighbors, and old friends who share common hobbies, talk more about "big things" and hobbies other than the trivial aspects of daily life. Family members are the descendants and relatives of the elderly. For those who are obligated to support the elderly, the company of their family members can make the elderly feel caring, both psychologically and physically. And there are friends. It refers to volunteer activities and market-oriented services. Young volunteers or young service personnel are willing to listen to the old people and help them understand new things. If you have all three, you are in a happy state, and the social life of the elderly can be basically satisfied. Among them, the company of family members is the most important, after all, only family members can shoulder this responsibility. "Loneliness" is a subjective state of social isolation accompanied by a painful experience of not being accepted due to the individual's perceived isolation or lack of contact with others. Loneliness has become a common problem of modern people, especially in the elderly. Who's old age may be a bloody storm. Of course, if there are special circumstances where family members cannot accompany you, you can only rely on the last option. Don't exclude old-age care services. Perhaps only market-oriented old-age care services can provide the final dignity and spiritual comfort for the elderly. Discussion: Will you reject market-oriented elderly care services when you are old?

(Responsible editor:A solitary woman)

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